Hey team!
This is a paper I wrote while in Jerusalem. I hope you like it.

Christmas rolled around Ellensburg Washington at the same time of year that it did for everyone else. It was bitter cold; the temperature rarely went into the double digits. I was a brand new missionary, enjoying the festive season and the kindness that was being poured upon me by members in the ward. I wasn’t homesick but I knew that my mother missed me dearly. I decided to take great care to make my phone call home meaningful and comforting.

Each Christmas eve, my family would gather around candles and read aloud the Christmas story. Our tiny living room in Manhattan would become a grotto as candlelight danced across the window onto the busy street. Dad’s mood would determine how many verses were to be recited. Not wanting to miss this tradition, I requested and received permission from my Mission President to call home on Christmas Eve. I thought it would be a nice gesture to my mother.

I lit a small candle on my desk, stationed in the corner of a cold basement in a rickety old farmhouse and read along over the phone. Dad decided that this year, we would read Luke 2 in its entirety. I took my turn to read aloud verse 49. Though written two thousand years ago, the words became mine. “Wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business?” Time seemed to stand still. My mother was comforted and knew that I was doing a great work. Like Jesus, she knew I had to leave everything behind, including family and friends to serve a higher purpose. My gratitude to the Lord was immense for he had comforted my Mother and taught me a valuable lesson.

Reflecting on the story, Christ’s desertion to the temple seems counterintuitive. It would not have been any trouble to inform Joseph and Mary of his decision to study in the temple. How could he worry his parents so desperately? I do not have a perfect answer to this question but I can take a stab at it. Mont Poulsen provided a powerful insight in the July 2011 Ensign. Brother Poulsen points out that many of the good things, like children and marriage, when done in the wrong order is a “disaster.” “Satan deceives us by convincing us to do the right thing in the wrong order.” The Savior taught on many occasions that the greatest commandments, and thus the ones Satan is most interested in, is to love God and our neighbors (Luke 10:27). The consequences of incorrectly prioritizing these two commandments are dire.

            It is easy to justify our sins by prioritizing people over God. I cannot number the dumb things done by missionaries in my mission in the name of companion, district or zone unity. It is vital that we consider the feelings of others and the impact our decisions will make, but we must first consider what God thinks of our decisions, then how it will affect other people. Elder Holland in October 2012 General Conference taught, “the crowning characteristic of love is always loyalty.”  

            The Savior wants us to be loyal to and love all men equally. The importance of this principle is evident its status as the second greatest commandment in the universe. Yet we often make it the greatest commandment when our loyalty to our brothers and sisters supersedes our loyalty to God. Christ’s love of his Father drew him to the temple as he left behind his friends and family and I can attest to the blessings of loving God more than man. As I read the scriptures with, but far from, my family those years ago in a hick town in the middle of nowhere, I could feel the encircling arms of a God who was blessing us for loving him more than each other. 

My Bearrie Brothers,

We love each other. but we must love God even more. 

In God We Trust

AllllllRiiiigght there friends. Its been a while since I've done my duty to the blog. I'm ready to start recommitting now though. First things first, the wedding was sick! The Bearrie boys represented hard and brought an awesome party. Thanks for getting everybody pumped and laying down a killer rap. I was so jealous that I didn't have a verse in that. But it was also just sick and I was stoked to be there.

I'm sitting in class at one of my first days in med skool right now. Its orientation week and some of these presentations get a little boring so I decided it was time to write a real quick devo up on here. I've felt very grateful lately for a couple big blessings that have come into my life lately. A couple big changes have occurred in my life lately including moving to Colorado, getting married, and starting a new school. Everything really came together kind of at the last minute. 8 months ago I really had no idea what I was doing. I was working really hard in school but I didn't have any guarantee that that work would actually get me where I wanted to go. That was kind of stressful. I also knew that if I did get into med school on this application cycle I would be leaving Utah and BYU very quickly and moving to a very liberal, non-Mormon state. This was scary for a couple reasons but mostly because I was a single dude who wasn't dating anyone and didn't have anything serious on the radar. I knew that both my time and my options to date would be very limited in med school and I was a little bit worried that I was condemning myself to a life of celibacy. Once I got into school I started worrying more about this doubting that I had spent the majority of my undergrad in the library and had not allocated enough time to dating.

I share that only because I know that all of us have had similar doubts and worries in our lives about either the same topics or totally different ones. Sometimes life requires us to go out on faith, not knowing whats ahead. As Paul said,

"For we walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Cor. 5:7).

Giving us hope in these times the Lord says, "Be thou humble; and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to thy prayers" (D&C 112:10); and again in Proverbs it is written, 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6). 

I just want to bear testimony today that things work out in life. I have seen that in my own life. Sometimes it takes a while and our prayers and hopes in life are not answered in exactly the way we hope or in the time frame that we want; but I know that if we strive to love Him and serve Him and trust in Him patiently when we're not sure whats going, things will eventually work out. He loves us and He knows what we need in life to be truly happy. Lets trust that the Lord will take care of us and will bless us as we serve Him. 

"Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him" (1 Cor. 2:9).

I want to say that of all my blessings I am most grateful to have my wife. She is an incredible lady that helps me a lot. Having her is totally worth any frustration experienced in dating and the continual, daily struggle to resist temptation and work to be a better man. I know that these things are true. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Are You Tough Enough?

One of my flaws as a writer (as I have been reminded multiple times by most of my psychology professors) is that I am too long-winded. So I am going to do my best to give you a concise powerful devo that includes all of my thoughts. But I might fail. Deal with it.

I was talking with Brother Bearrie Cees last night as he came by to check on me in my fragile state/eat all my ice cream when we got started on a topic that inspired this Bearrie Devo. Every single one of us has some really hard stuff that we have to deal with in this life. We are all dealt our individual burdens that no one else can carry for us or even fully understand. They are ours to face and work through as we live this life. And we know this a purposeful aspect in the grand design of the Plan of Salvation. We are told in 1st Nephi that we will be given difficult tasks and heavy loads, but that Heavenly Father will never give us more than we can handle. But sometimes it feels like maybe Heavenly Father made a mistake and gave us way too much. Sometimes it feels like it's impossible to push through...

At one point in my life I was really struggling with a lot of circumstances and trials that had come into my life through no fault of my own. They were not due to my mistakes or sins and it felt entirely unfair. I met with my Bishop about it and after I told him everything, he literally looked me in the face and said, "Billy, your situation is a real bitch." I was in shock. My Bishop just swore at me. But I really appreciated that he didn't try to act like my situation was fair. Because it wasn't. But he followed up that charming sentiment with this, "Billy, this situation isn't going to resolve itself and you're going to deal with it for most of your life. I can't fix that. All I can ask you is: Are you tough enough?" That question stuck. I have thought about it ever since. Am I tough enough? I am going to have to face hard things throughout life that will question my testimony, faith, hope, and endurance. I can't quit and turn around when things get hard. I need to keep pushing through no matter how unfair it is. I HAVE to be tough enough. Because I want to reach the prize at the end. The prize we are all working toward: eternal happiness and salvation with those that we love.

So, my brother and sister Bearries, I know life sucks sometimes. And I know sometimes it's our fault and sometimes it isn't. I know some of you are struggling to find someone to love and be with, some of you are moving to foreign new places and taking on huge scary challenges, I know some of you have experienced sickness and death of loved ones, and I know some of you have experienced doubts in regards to your testimony and the Church. And then I know there are hundreds of trials you all deal with that I'll never know about. But I just wanted to ask all of you: Are you tough enough? Search, ponder, and pray on that question until you can confidently answer, "Yes." Because I know you all are. Be a Bearrie. Be tough. And never forget the prize we are all working toward and the ultimate happiness we will receive. Love you all.

Three paragraphs. Not bad.